The last twenty months for most people as we engaged or disengaged with the pandemic, this created pain bodies for many of us. We were accustomed to do certain things when the day came; go to work, meet our friends and family, go to school, take a walk, go to the gym and the many other daily activities that for the most came to a stop. Of course it varied from country to country.

WELLBEING was dented, this was so for most of us.

Well Being is about that domain of us called Being. Western culture is a culture dominated by the doing aspect. The word being is pushed to one side as we grasp our ambitions to show what we can do and obviously post those achievements on our Facebook page. Yet at the heart of our pain body is that realm of Being.

Many people do use the word Consciousness for Being that I am addressing.
Let’s get to the nitty gritty of the pain body which if it is there would reside at the core of your Consciousness.
Six key questions to ask yourself?
1.    Am I still in pain from an emotional relationship?

2.    Do I have an on going denigrating chatter about my body? These tend to be two words sound bytes like; too fat, too skinny, too tall, too short, too small, too big etc.

3.    Am I caught in doing some goal that seems further and further away from me? Obviously doing a goal does not make sense. Yet how the narrative is in the person’s mind with their pain body, the achieving of that goal is a doing of it. An inner process of feeling it as already come to pass along with seeing it in that way is how goals are achieved.

4.    Am I incomplete stuck with grief from the loss of a loved one, especially if it is mother, father, husband, wife, and brother, sister also a pet?

5.    Am I addicted to some substance, habit, and activity?

6.    Am I caught in blame for certain experiences or situations in my life that my inner chatter is dominated by BLAME?

Once you have identified what these are, it is time to come home to yourself to accept yourself with a loving smile.

Some friends and students sometimes ask me, “How do I process this trauma?” In my eBook Your Emotions & The Alchemy of TIME. there is a whole section addressing individual approaches that one can take to rid one of traumas.

By the way this WELLBEING is all an inner healing process. There is nothing to show on the outside for engaging with this. Yet something will show which is the shining of your being as you diligently engage with this process.

Rex, ok I can feel how all of those 6 things can get in the way of my well being. But what are you aiming at?


Those 6 qualities linked to those 6 questions are things, which clutter your mental space. That space of CREATIVITY where things arise; this is also the Space that creates your WELLBEING.

I am well aware that there are many writers, songwriters, singers, musicians who suffered from addictions and who polished their pain, hurt, blues, anger, sadness to be a success. Obvious ones that come to mind are Marvin Gaye, amy whitehouse, Keith Richards. No way am I denying that. But I am addressing WELLBEING, which encompasses the genius of your creativity from a domain of WELLBEING SPACE.

Rex, why is this so important?

Over the decades, I have seen people, clients, celebrities, patients who put in concerted efforts to achieve certain results and it just does not happen.

When I look deeper at their lives, I realize that there is a pain body that is there with which they are more engaged with than their identifiable goal/wish that they aim to achieve.

Let me be more blunt they are compulsively obsessed with the inner chatter of that pain and upset. It has become like a perpetually present shadow that is always there that outshines their goal and dream as it gets more energy on a daily basis than their wished for dream.

Rex Lassalle
  • The place that it shows up most predominantly is with people who are on a weight loss or weight gain program. You often see it with such individuals. Some obvious celebrities that have had such challenges are adele Jessica Simpson, Shonda Rhimes, Ricky Gervaiss, Khloe Kardahian, along with those wanting to gain weight Jenna Jameson, Denise Richards.

The addendum in this context I have observed over the decades even when they have lost endless amount of kilos achieving their goal or gained so much weight for those wanting to gain weight.

Yet it was never complete. It is like saying to the Universe I am incomplete until and that until stretches into infinity. Dissatisfaction is then added to their pain, compounding it, which sends them in another direction for a while, as they are upset with themselves. Pushing them further away from their Wellbeing.

Without dropping that pain body that sense of WELLBEING is not present and all their doings do not bring them to their Being. In fact it fragments their life into competitive departments. In a seeming competition with themselves, is an awkward approach that some people take to create a momentum or motivation for them to accomplish a goal.

Please readers I am not dismissing the Doing aspect and the achieving qualities of an individual’s life. Wellbeing occurs from a different approach.

Obviously readers are engaging with my blog for the Fix it line. My Fix It line includes an aspect, in fact it is much more than includes, it requires and request the need for Surrender. I sense some readers have clicked to another website when they read that word Surrender.

But it does, to engage with Space, surrender is important. You can’t move space around; we have no leverage on Space we have to give it space. Obviously us humans in our futile attempts at controlling space we bring clutter. This gives us some sense of controlling space when in fact it illustrates our delusional approach to this important dimension of our lives.  

Next up is WELLBEING & OBESITY to be posted

3 thoughts on “WELLBEING & YOUR PAIN BODY”

  1. denigrating chatter about my body, is definitely one for me. And the emotions from a past relationship. Very interesting. Time to get down to the nitty gritty.
    Going to re-read a couple times.

  2. Thanks for this excellent piece Rex. Tobago is heading into the niche market of Wellness Tourism. There was a conference on it last week.

  3. Thanks Rex your tone and clarity supports us all to get real about our ‘pain bodies’… Getting real doesn’t mean we have to get serious about them of course… I like to feel my ‘collection of agrivations are my teachers guiding me home…


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Rex Lassalle